A birth story

Saturday April 30th I woke around 6:00am with feelings of an irritable stomach and a sensation to use the restroom. Once finished I headed back to sleep, needing to return to the bathroom another two times before I woke up for good around 8:30 or so. Feeling a little sickly and slightly nauseous I still was feeling up for the day, having an errand or two to run. The first being the laundry. Maybe I had eaten something that did not sit well with me? I thought. That would also explain my loose bowel movements, and "stomach" sensitivities. I slipped into some comfortable clothes (as one does when one is feeling under the weather and eight months pregnant). Cardon and I gathered up the laundry and headed down the street to the local mat. I was dropped off with the dirty's and Cardon left having his own errand to run. I would see him in an hour or so.

9:40 am
I put the clothes in the wash, doing a few loads at a time. Still not feeling well, I continued to blow it off by distracting myself. I made a call to my mom. Just a normal conversation, no real mention of me not feeling well because it didn't seem to be too major of deal. As the laundry progressed, so did my "sickness," I was lucky they had a restroom there. I had to visit it once or twice while there. After switching the wash to the dryers I was feeling a little overwhelmed, I had to get out of there. I went outside to get some air. I took an immediate right and headed down the block with plans to walk it off and breath my way through the uncomfort.

10:35 am
I made it to the end of the block and called Cardon he said he was only 5 minutes away. I told him he could find me down the block. I was trying to walk off my nausea and the overall "I don't feel well." The fresh air helped some, better than the confines of the laundry mat. I saw Cardon park down the block, close the door and approach me. "Whats wrong," He asked. I don't know I just don't feel well, I have some weird stomach thing going on and diarrhea. Walk with me up and down the block until the clothes are ready. As we did this I stopped every thirty or so yards due to a cramping sensation. Are these contractions? No no, they cant be, I still have three weeks until my projected due date. I could tell by the questions Cardon asked and by his reaction to my pause mid stride to hold and rub my now 37 week old tummy. He wasn't buying it. But something very real was happening.

This being my first pregnancy I had never had a contraction before. So I only had a vague idea of what I thought it would/should feel like. I didn't want to mis-read a stomach cramp for a contraction. But also didn't want to just assume it was a cramp when it was in fact a contraction.

11:00 am
Once back in laundry mat we started to pull the now dry clothes from the dryers. I had to abandoned the task within minutes and head (again) to the bathroom. There I sat with my eyes closed and head against the wall for at least 8 minutes. When I emerged from the bathroom I shot Cardon a pitiful look and said, "I'm going home." Living only 6 blocks away I started my journey...

I called back my mom just to see if she thought there could be any link of my upset stomach sickness and slight cramping to labor. She wasn't home, my father answered "Is everything ok?" Still not thinking it could actually be, I said yes and hung up the phone. Two more blocks to go. At this point I still didn't fully believe I was in labor. Once home, I filled the bath and figured it would help me relax and my "stomach" to settle. It helped only momentarily, as I lay there I had (again) the sensation to go to the bathroom. In the time before Cardon returned home with the clean clothes I had passed the time switching from the tub to toilet (It is important to note that every time "I went to the bathroom" or was on the toilet I was not actually going to the bathroom I just had the sensation to. Which in hind sight was the pressure of the baby moving down and my cervix opening).

11:50 am
When Cardon returned home I was laying on my side in the bathtub, I asked him to please get me a towel and lay it across me. He capitulated, reading the tone of my voice. Somewhere between the tub and toilet I finally believed I was in labor. Cardon, did not. Not until moments later he discovered the "bloody show" I had left behind in my last toilet visit. Once Cardon saw this he believed me 100%. We don't even have a baby bag ready! I complained. My contractions were getting closer and more painful. I couldn't believe how quickly it all was happening, progressing. I was rocking my hips and adjusting positions. Cardon was in and out of the bathroom scrambling pretending to be calm gathering items to put together our scrappy and make shift birth bag. Things like graham crackers and multiple t-shirts? I felt most comfortable on the floor where I would sway my hips and squat down. Beginning to implement some of the things I had learned from reading, watching videos, and in my natural birth class. We knew also we should began timing the contractions -- 2 minutes 45 seconds apart. "Call the Birth Center!"

1:20 pm
One of my midwifes, Asaya answered. I spoke with her briefly but mainly sat with her on the phone as she listened to me have a contraction(s). To gauge how far along I was and to read the situation. We agreed to talk again in 20 minutes to see how things would progress and if the timing of the contractions change.

This was 3 weeks before we were due! Luckily we just got our crib a few days earlier and Cardon had just put it together. We also just got a car seat the previous week at a baby shower (still in the box). As I continued to labor in the bathroom, switching from the floor, to the bath, to the toilet, Cardon continued to throw items into bag--towel, flashlight? while running back and forth to support me through my now more intense contractions. He would rub and massage my back. This helped though the contractions seemed to be advancing quicker than what i had imagined. They were getting closer together and more painful. "Cardon get in here! he came running, "Get out of here!" he left. This seemed to make sense at the time. I kept trying to run through the info from my birth class in my head. I began to really focus and get into my own head, finding a happy, and comfortable place. I thought things like, I never have to go through that contraction, that one right there, again. One closer to the baby being born, this helped. I also would try and focus on the blessing of a baby, a baby that was making his way to see us. If he could do it, I could, I thought. Everyone I knew or know now was born of a woman. I remember Ceridwin (our birthing class instructor) telling us you can tell when a women switches from early labor to active labor because she gets really short with her spouse. I had done that. Giving short answers, being a bit snappy. I have been doing that too. Could I already be advanced that far into labor? And that's when my water broke. I was leaning over the edge of the tub with my forehead buried in my arms, looking at the liquid, I took a few seconds before yelling, "Time to go!" Cardon was soooo great through the whole process. Constantly encouraging me, giving me positive empowering reassurance, massaging me, supporting me. And remaining calm. He laid out two towels and a pillow in the back of the car. We timed it so that I would walk to the car between contractions. Once the contraction I was having stopped. We shuffled out to the car. We were on our way.

1:35 pm
We were five minutes into our 25-30 minute drive to Sheepshead Bay Brooklyn when the Birth Center called back to check in. Wanting to know how close our contractions were etc. Cardon was on the phone, and informed them that we decided he was coming much quicker than we thought and that my water broke, and that we had already left. They said good decision, we will be ready and waiting! I was in a squatting position in the back seat on all fours. One knee on the floor the other on the seat. Swaying my hips from side-to-side as my water continued to break. I had a pair of Cardon's underwear on under a loose robe to keep me modest while driving. My butt was raised in the air, and my head buried in the seat. Totally zoned out, I don't think I spoke more than 2-3 words the whole way there. I just needed to be in my zone and really focus what was happening. This is my body and I AM going to be able to do this. I found rhythms any way I could to help me focus, swaying back-and-forth, breathing, and chanting in my head. This helped. As we drove I could tell this baby was getting close. There was so much pressure on my tailbone! To counteract this I would take one of my hands and pull/push against my tail bone as hard as I could until the contraction ended. My hand and arm would quack and shake as I did this to illustrate the intensity. I started to feel sensations to push. "Hurry!" I managed to get out. I continued to comfort myself saying I never have to go through that contraction again, one contraction closer to seeing your beautiful baby. "Ten more minutes to the Center" I heard Cardon say, "and no traffic."

2:00 pm
We arrived at the birthing center, Cardon double parked and walked me up to the front doors where my midwifes were waiting with out stretched arms. They walked me back to my room. I laid down on the bed and and they were surprised to find I was fully dilated! They were happy that we took the initiative to leave earlier than wait to hear from them. They asked me where Cardon was (he was parking the car) and said "do you want to wait for him to push?" Ahhh NO, I can't wait. So they set my down and got me all situated. The lights were dimmed, and they put on some soothing music. Let the oxytocin flow I thought.

I was lucky to have had 2 nurse midwifes or CNM's and 2 birthing assists there for my labor and birth. The energy in the room was very positive and they were all wonderful, amazing, perfect. Each giving me a different but positive energy. Helping to soothe me, support me, and empower me. "I can do this," I said. Yes you most definitely can and will, was the response. Due to me already being fully dilated they thought pushing would probably go by as fast. Hence the wait for your husband comment. But this was not the case, I ended up pushing for around an hour and a half or more! In this time I didn't say much, yell out, or scream, I seemed to internalize all my efforts, I moaned, I groaned. I did let out some deep powerful animalistic grunts towards the end surprising myself and Cardon. He was next to me the entire time, It was wonderful. I was in four different positions while pushing. I started on my back sitting in between Cardon legs laid back onto his body. The second position was on a birthing stool to let gravity help move the baby down. The stool was placed next to the bed, again between Cardons legs. He rubbed and massaged my back. The lights were dimmed way down during this point and occasionally the midwife would turn on a flash light to see how I was progressing. After awhile I moved back to the bed but this time was on my knees resting my upper body on a birthing or yoga ball. I was in this position for the shortest amount of time. The final position I was in was on my right side with Cardon laying next to me. He would place a wet wash cloth on my head and fan me with a paper fan provided him by a birth assistant. I was so deep in my own mental place, I was only partially aware of what was happening around me. I spoke to myself words and thoughts of support and encouragement. Apparently at some point (though I don't remember) Cardon said I made a joke about "Getting down to business" before a contraction that made my midwifes snicker. While in the final position they tied knots on each end of a sheet. During contractions I would pull as hard as I could on one side while Yuliya (one of my midwives) would pull on the other end like a tug-of-war. This helped to move him down lower. Pushing was such a crazy feeling, trying with all my might and bear down (really push down low) with everything I had. Then between contractions I would try to relax and take deep breathes to make sure Koos was getting enough oxygen (They were checking his heart rate throughout). On a couple of occasions I had to be told to relax and to stop pushing because the contraction was over. I just wanted him to be out already! Nearing the end my energy level was so low. I had only eaten an apple that day and was not very hydrated. I sipped water through out which helped some. My midwife(s) reading my energy level had me reach down and feel the crown of my baby's head. It was such an odd and extraordinary feeling. Knowing that I was that close to meeting my new baby. Women's bodies are so amazing! I remember a few pushes later his head was out and after a 30 second pause until the next contraction out slipped his body. I heard his little scream, and saw his deep red lips on his purple pale little face. They rested him on my chest all covered in vernix, which was really neat to see. He snuggled right up to mom. I was overwhelmed with feelings of gratefulness. Grateful that he was here safe and that Cardon and I were being entrusted with the care of the beautiful baby boy. I still can't believe he is mine and I get to keep him.

3:43 pm
Koos Oden Webb was born at 3:43pm on April 30, 2011. 6lbs 5oz.

My mom called right after Koos was born and was like, "Cardon's mom told me you were in labor, there is no way, I talked to you earlier at the laundry mat and you were fine. What is going on!?" I responded, Our little boy was just born, he jumped the gun on us by three weeks...

4:15 pm
After Koos was out and doing well. It was time to birth the placenta. I guess this is usually the easier part. They just kind of massage and push/pull it out. But something was different about mine. They couldn't seem to get it out and they were very cautious and concerned knowing I have had had major abdominal surgery in the past (scarring can be an issue). After trying some different positions and some massaging techniques to no avail, it was decided to transfer me to the hospital just to be safe. Due to what is called a "partially attached placenta" I wasn't too worried, I was just glad that Koos was here safe and sound. Pictures were taken as my ride to the hospital was prepared.

4:25 pm
Once at the hospital. They moved me into a room. They would need to go in vaginally and manually remove my placenta. Since I was admitted the baby also had to be admitted as well. But to be honest I was really impressed with the staff and care provided at Maimonides Hospital. And this is coming from someone who doesn't like hospitals. Asaya came with me to the hospital and made sure I was treated well, she was my watch dog. She made sure Koos stayed with Cardon while I was looked after. Rather than be whisked away to the nursery.

After a small procedure, I was reunited to my family (sounds funny saying that still). Ahhh finally I can reeeelax, and eat! Cardon went to a store while mom and babe napped. I was happy to awake to his presented bananas and peanut butter. "Your eye looks red" he said, "you must of popped a capillary while pushing." Yeah that sounds about right, I answered as I sneaked a peak to watch the rise and fall of our new born baby's chest.